Personal Development

On Race and Oneness

I believe that Oneness exists. I believe that everything is interconnected.  I believe that separation is the result of rampant fears. In fact, I believe that what separates us has no true value, like empty calories.

Here is what I also believe:  All of sudden saying “we are one” doesn’t negate the debilatating effects that separation, particularly race, has caused. Accepting oneness while living in a society that still upholds separation makes for a pendulum of emotions, opinions, and confusion.

Rather than talk about this, I have found it far easier to ignore. It’s uncomfortable. It’s way less interesting than talking about manifesting, self empowerment, and other trendy self help topics.  Every time I try not to acknowledge, I feel something well up even stronger inside of me. I am learning to surrender to that wave and share.

On the quest to transcend the illusion of separation caused by racial categories, it is imperative that people of color’s stories not be stifled . We cannot move beyond until we work through. Uncomfortable? Absolutely.  Beyond discomfort is freedom for all.

Race is the elephant in the room that we acknowledge, pet a bit, then brush under the rug. I think it’s time to let it roam free.

It’s hard to talk about race, especially hear in the USA, because its uncomfortable for both sides. It’s uncomfortable for white people to hear the horrors of what people of color experience daily. It’s difficult for people of color to hear that many white people have been so unaware. Its a two way street of discomfort that we must experience. We truly can’t accept each other until we understand what has defined us for so long.

Whenever race is inserted into a conversation, things get heavy (even when talking about other weighty topics like money, religion, and gender). It feels burdensome, like something that should be avoided. I am learning in my life, that what I want to avoid is the very thing I should examine the most. I see the topic of race as no different. 

There is so much shame around talking about race and racism. You start to speak out and people say you are playing the race card. Or that we now have a Black President. Or that things are so much better than they were a hundred years ago. You begin to feel ashamed for speaking up. You begin to hold back the stories of  hardships that have been caused in your family solely based on skin color.

Over on Twitter yesterday, Dream Hampton made a this very powerful statement:

“If the average blk man, or woman for that matter, were to describe the daily, micro aggressive racism they face, they’d seem paranoid”

Even though I wasn’t a slave or alive during the segregated south, racism still affects my life and lives of families around me. Generation after generation  deals with it in some way.  When a group of people are intentionally made to feel inferior for hundreds of years, those beliefs and conditioning don’t die as easy as many people want them to. 

I believe in Oneness wholeheartedly.  I also believe in honesty. I also believe in truth. I also believe in vulnerability. We  cannot be vulnerable until we acknowledge what is really going on in the world that we live in.

We all know that is difficult to recondition our minds from unconscious thoughts which end up wreaking havoc on our lives.  Now think about all of the limiting beliefs that were affirmed publicly in our Constitution, government, and other scholarly journals in regards to Black people. How much more will those systemic thoughts coupled with unconscious ones affect generations of people raising their children. It passes on the belief that they are less than. How might that effect a family over a course of generations? How might it affect a family when the men are taken away and can’t protect there own? It creates the situation that we have now: Black people who are severely lost and no rush for anyone to take collective responsibility for it.  This reality makes the response ‘we are one”  in response to racism feel more like saying “get over it already.”

There is so much pain that is still unspoken. That unacknowledged pain is running the show and wants to be acknowledged. It wants to be allowed to express itself without shame.

Many a therapist and expert will say that moving through painful memories helps to clear the psyche. Every master or guru will advise one to to acknowledge what is here first,witness the fear and limiting beliefs before moving onward. Are we really witnessing people’s pain?  Are we giving each soul a chance to be seen?

Vulnerability is not just about sharing openly without shame. It is also about listening in the same way and having a deep sense of empathy.

May we hear the voices and souls of groups of people who have been historically marginalized.

May we stop running from discomfort and dive into conversations that uplift our collective consciousness.

May we build bridges of trust between each other where fear has existed.

May we allow ourselves to see and be seen.

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